Monthly Archives: March 2012

Morning

In the morning, just after my alarm goes off, while I am laying in the silence, I hear the patter of paws.  He knows.  He sits on the floor waiting, he won’t jump up until he knows for sure I am awake.  He just watches.  I give him some encouragement – it’s okay, I’m up!  He considers it.  I pat the bed, he is convinced and hops up.  He begins kneading my bladder, purring contentedly.  This is our morning routine. …

Eighteen

Jessica, Jenifer, Jacob, and Jillian.  Yes, my parents are crazy.  Last week the littlest, Jillian, became the last adult in our family of six.  Eighteen.  Whoa.  We are all adults now.  Yeesh. When she was little my dad called her chick babe, for some reason, and we all referred to her as the baby until she was eight or nine.  Mom wanted to name her Paige, but knew she just couldn’t have Jessica, Jenifer, Jacob, and Paige.  It definitely would …

a humorless post about minor life changes

If you have read my boring ass about me section, you know that I started introducing myself as Jen, consciously, when I got into high school.  I was 14 and thought it was super important that people spell my name right.  I had a higher chance of getting people to spell Jen right than I did getting people to spell Jenifer right.  So I became Jen. Fast forward ten plus years and it has become deeply ingrained in me to …

So You’ve Married a Brit

You would think that after five years together Rob and I would have come across all of the differences you can possibly think of.  Aluminum/Aluminium, Tidy/Clean,  Rubbish/Trash, Dick/Knob.  You get the gist.  But there are things. Things.  That sometimes lead to arguments. Him: Give me your purse. Me: hands over purse Him: I just wanted your purse. Me: I gave you my purse! Him: glares Me: Fuck you. Him: FUCK YOU. Purse/Wallet/Handbag/WTF?!  England: Purse = Wallet.  America: Purse = Handbag. Then …

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