I can feel it in my bones

Tonight is going to be an insomnia night.  I know it.  I am nervous too late in the day for it not to be.  And that is what it has always been.  If I don’t calm my nerves by a certain time I have hit the point of no return – there is no going back.  It is sort of like being cold for me.  I can handle being cold for a while, but once I hit that point, there is no going back.  The only solution is a bath.  Unfortunately for me, a bath doesn’t generally solve insomnia the way it solves being freezing.  I generally have three options: 1) stay up all night; 2) drift in and out with Gilmore Girls on in the background, finally hitting solid sleep at around 3:00 a.m.; 3) take sleeping pills.

I really don’t like option 1, ever.  I only do it when I realize that I am not going to sleep way too late in the game.  It ruins my day and I usually die at about 4:00 p.m. the following afternoon.  Option 2 is workable, given that I have nothing important to do the following day.  I am groggy but much better than I would be given option 1.  Option 3 is both the worst and best option all packed into one.  It is probably the option that I will go with tonight, again.  It is lovely because I get a full night’s sleep with minimal effort on my part.  It is terrible because it is deceptive.  That full night’s sleep doesn’t actually count!  Haha!  It is just pretend.  You really never slept at all!  So though I got a full night’s sleep, I am just as tired as if I had done Option 1.  Awesome.  So, really.  No good options.

Secret Option 4: Blog while waiting to fall asleep.



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