we had a plan, dammit.

But, is there any point of sticking to the plan if it isn’t a very good one and after some consideration you decide that you don’t really like the plan at all?

Probably not.

I am going to law school. This is the new plan. Year after next, given that I do reasonably well on the LSATs. This is the plan. The old plan was crappy anyway. We move back to California to be with family, Rob becomes an engineer and Jen does…?? We never had that planned! Jen was just left, to figure it out. Jen would do… something.

Well, Jen has decided.

I want to go to law school and I am determined now. No looking back. For the past three years it has been law school or PhD? Law school or PhD? NO, seriously, make up your mind!

I think it has always been law school, but lawyer can be a dangerous word. My dad was a lawyer and gave up quickly to go back to being an officer of the law. Given the relationship I had with my dad I never wanted to be anything similar to him. I figured if I was a lawyer I would become him. This is not true. Not true.

My mom is as supportive as she can be, given the circumstances. She loves me, but she wants to stick to the plan. It would mean Rob and I were settled in California permanently. To be honest, my mother’s wishes are the reason it has taken me three years to get here. I don’t want to upset her. I want her to be proud of me. My mom and I are very close, doing something she isn’t completely on board with is hard for me. Really hard.

But, I can’t pick my path in life based on what will make her happy, no matter how much I would like to at times. Hopefully when she sees what kind of lawyer I would like to be, her mind will change. I would love to work for the ACLU. Or the government. I know those seem like opposites, but they aren’t. What better way to defend people’s rights than to work within the system?


I am going to be a damn good lawyer.

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