where I go from here, part III

part I, part II

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After I accepted the position with TFA there were a lot of steps that needed to be taken. In those first few weeks after my acceptance I had scheduled a handful of different conversations with TFA alums that were parents and TFA alums from the LA region. I remember I only got to have one of those conversations. The second never happened because I went into labor. I remember texting the woman I was supposed to talk to, saying I would have to reschedule. I’m nothing, if not responsible.

After the girls were born all TFA deadlines came to a halt for several weeks. However, when the girls were only about six weeks I had to get back to TFA. In order to teach in California I had to take and pass the CSET and CBEST. TFA had warned me that the CSET was an exceptionally rigorous test that I might have to take multiple times. Needless to say, with the memory of the Bar still in my mind, I freaked out quite a bit.

I started trying to carve out time to study anywhere I could. We had sitters come to the house two days a week for a few hours so I could get some studying done. Evie and Liv were still such a handful that we had to have two sitters. I would watch the Crash Course history videos (praise God for John Green) in the middle of the night while I was up with the girls. I think I was delirious for most of December and January. My memories from December are fuzzy and dark. Not as in depressing, but as in I remember always working in the dark because Evie and Liv were asleep.

All I really remember of the day of the CSET was how cold it was in the classroom. I wore layers like a seasoned tester and I still froze my ass off. I think I wrote an essay on the role of women in history? Hard to say. The CBEST was a little bit better but I had to remember how to multiply and divide. I spent the rest of January holding my breath and was very surprised to have passed everything.

Though the testing was one of the biggest hurdles I had to jump, I have kept running. Many deadlines and to-do lists for TFA. Some days I feel like wonder woman. Some days I feel like I am trying to push a boulder up a mountain while balancing plates on my head. I am exhausted. But I am getting there.

What’s next? Early in January I found out that my summer training, or teacher boot camp, would not be taking place in LA, but Phoenix.

Uhhh… our June just got very interesting.

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